Alone but not Lonely

I haven't a reason, a clue or a sign, I haven't the slightest idea of the shape of your heart or the state of your mind, Do you ever let anyone near? Do you ever reach out with arms open wide?
Do you ever jump in closing your eyes?
Or are you one of the fortunate kind, Alone but not lonely

Everyday on the street I study their faces, the ones who rush on through the crowd, towards their own quiet worlds, their separate places, somewhere I'm never allowed. 'Cause I've always been one to say what I need, And than the next thing it's done and I'm watching 'em leave, And I'm thinking, I wish I could be Alone but not lonely

So which one are you tonight? Do you change with the morning light?
Do you say more than what sounds right? Do you say what you mean?

There are moments in time that are meant to be held like fragile, breakable things
There are others that pass us, you can't even tell, such is their grace and their speed
And this one is gone in the blink of an eye, You can ask me the truth but tonight I will lie
Unflinching I'll tell you that I'm alone but not lonely

Mary Chapin Carpenter - Time*Sex*Love  - Alone but not Lonely

The Net

She brings them in
with outstretched hands
and pounding heart

She brings them in
with eyes raised
and full voice

She brings them in
with firm stance
and fixed gaze

She is the net for the fish
Cast her out into the seas
She will return you a full yield

Again and again
Throw her to calm waves
or angry seas.

She is made to last
of strong weave
and wondrous craft.

Stay alert
for signs of strain
Mend her or lose her.

She asks no share in the catch.
No meal in the evening.
Her reward is the use.


Jennifer D. Behnke  - May 28, 2013

El pozo - The Well by Pablo Neruda

A veces te hundes, caes en tu agujero de silencio,
en tu abismo de cólera orgullosa,
y apenas puedes
volver, aún con jirones
de lo que hallaste
en la profundidad de tu existencia.

Amor mío, qué encuentras en tu pozo cerrado?
Algas, ciénagas, rocas?
Qué ves con ojos ciegos,
rencorosa y herida?

Mi vida, no hallarás
en el pozo en que caes
lo que yo guardo para ti en la altura:
un ramo de jazmines con rocío
un beso más profundo que tu abismo.

No me temas, no caigas
en tu rencor de nuevo.
Sacude la palabra mía que vino a herirte
y déjala que vuele por la ventana abierta.
Ella volverá a herirme
sin que tú la dirijas
puesto que fue cargada con un instante duro
y ese instante será desarmado en mi pecho.

Sonríeme radiosa
si mi boca te hiere.
No soy un pastor dulce
como en los cuentos de hadas,
sino un buen leñador que comparte contigo
tierra, viento y espinas de los montes.

Ámame, tú, sonríeme,
ayúdame a ser bueno.
No te hieras en mí, que será inútil,
no me hieras a mí porque te hieres.
_________________________
At times you sink, you fall
into your hole of silence,
into your abyss of proud anger,
and you can scarcely
return, still bearing remnants
of what you found
in the depth of your existence.

My love, what do you find
in your closed well?
Seaweed, swamps, rocks?
What do you see with blind eyes,
bitter and wounded?

Darling, you will not find
in the well into which you fall
what I keep for you on the heights:
a bouquet of dewy jasmines,
a kiss deeper than your abyss.

Do not fear me, do not fall
into your rancor again.
Shake off my word that came to wound you
and let it fly through the open window.
It will return to wound me
without your guiding it
since it was laden with a harsh instant
and that instant will be disarmed in my breast.

Smile at me radiant
if my mouth wounds you.
I am not a gentle shepherd
like the ones in fairy tales,
but a good woodsman who shares with you
earth, wind, and mountain thorns.

Love me, you, smile at me,
help me to be good.
Do not wound yourself in me, for it will be useless,
do not wound me because you wound yourself.

Etiquetas: Pablo Neruda

I just purchased a copy of "The Captain's Verses" today, after a long and trying week. This is where the book 'hit me where I live'. #grateful

Twilight

Stillness comes
with the sun's dying rays and gold dissolves into darkest cerulean.

Suspended breezes
And prismatic jeweled plain. An expanse of sky and stars where I would remain.

Trees silhouetted
At once comforting and grotesque, taciturn anchors that mark my shipwreck.

Cloudless skies
Without bulwark or storm distraction, Only placidly suffocating grief of my own creation.

This is all that remains
Between me an eternity.
Acceptance. Absolution.

Jennifer D. Behnke - May 18, 2013

Communion - by Louise Erdrich - from "Baptism of Desire" - 'Sacraments'

It is spring. The tiny frogs pull their strange new bodies out of the suckholes, the sediment of rust, and float upward, each in a silver bubble that breaks on the water's surface, to one clear unceasing note of need.

Sometimes, when I hear them, I leave our bed and stumble among the white shafts of weeds to the edge of the pond. I sink to the throat, and witness the ravenous trill of the body transformed at last and then consumed in a rush of music.

Sing to me, sing to me.
I have never been so cold
rising out of sleep.

Louise Erdrich - from "Baptism of Desire" - 'Sacraments: Communion'

I recently gave a copy of 'Baptism of Desire' to one of my favorite contemporary composers at Christmas time. I am hoping he hears the music in this as vibrantly as I do.